Eurovision 2013: crystal-gazing for Malmö


Hello, Europe! It’s Camilla calling. Here are the House of Apcar pre-semi-final predictions for Eurovision 2013…good luck!

 How I want the top five to look…

  1. Switzerland
  2. Croatia
  3. Montenegro
  4. Romania
  5. Ukraine

If any of these don’t make the final I will be very upset, as there’s nothing I would love more than to see – and yell along to – them live. And of course, Loreen in the customary winner’s encore.

Where the UK will place…no higher than 14th in the final. Unless Bonnie is really still as popular over there as (apparently deluded) fans keep claiming. Even Bonnie couldn’t deny that she didn’t think she’d make the top five on Graham Norton’s show this week. “I think you’re hoping a little bit too much, you know how political it is…” Whatever excuse you need to give yourself, B.

Who I think will actually end up in the top five (and I look forward to being proven wrong)…

  1. Netherlands
  2. Ukraine
  3. Denmark
  4. Germany
  5. Slovenia

This year’s biggest names are…Cascada (below) for Germany, and the Netherlandish Anouk who has had her fair share of success on the continent.

The bookies are tipping…Denmark to win at the moment, with the ladies from Ukraine, Norway and Russia in tow. Italy and Switzerland, to my delight, are currently following with an average of 20/1 to win.

I’m rooting for…the Swiss band Takasa (below). I could not love them more.

Watch out for…Slovenia’s Hannah Mancini. With that mixture of pop and a measure of dubstep beats that central Europe will just about withstand, she could take a similar route to last year’s winner, Loreen.

Against my better judgement…I love the Croatian entry, Klapa s Mora. I have a sentimental yearning for Mizerja, although have had little luck convincing my two fellow Eurovision-goers of its harmonious merits. But if those babushki managed to get so far last year, these heartfelt chaps are just as deserving. I’ve also been playing the Hungarian track Kedvesem on repeat.

In the good looks department…Gianluca Bezzina is a boyish contender for Malta, but may well by edged out by Azerbaijani representative Farid Mammadov’s infectious chorus.

Bust a move to…the Ukrainian, Belarusian and Moldavian ladies. Despite my best wishes for FYR Macedonia, Lozano will be the phenomenal Esma’s downfall (below).

From the best of the non-starter ballads…Denmark’s Emmelie will do well with her flute-playing companion and those massive steel drums, although if he reprises his trilby/cheeky smile combo, Roberto could rival her by pulling on the same heartstrings that voted Alexander Rybak to victory in 2009.

I’m interested to see…how well Montenegro manages to champion the dubstep trend as a signal of Eurovision’s potential future, as well as how the Albanian rockers fare, with their very good chance of wooing the male viewership.